Friday, May 23, 2008

In memoriam of life events

Today I went to visit my mom's gravesite and pay my respects on this day of her birth -she will be 81 if she was still alive and although I know she is in a better place I still miss her deeplly -It is additionally hard to deal  with when I am grieving the loss of her along with my best friend who committed suicide in 2003 and also dealing with  my diagnosis of prostate cancer as of March 17th St.Patrick's Day. I have been told that I am dealing with it pretty good and I think I am also , but I do wonder sometime and question if I should be dealing with it differently based the severity and time span that these events which was in a five year period. I am getting the idea that these are wake up calls to be more cognizant of who I am and If I dont know then I should pursue those goals. That means emotionally ,spiritually and physically my objective is to improve upon those areas. 

Unfortunately these issues are now affecting how I am looking at my life presently -it has affected my concentration on my educational goals. I am falling behind in my studies -my motivation has changed in that regard . I wont go into too much more than that. 

No one knows or would volunteer to walk in my shoes , sometimes I wish I didnt either. Everyone has a slew of problems that they have to deal with and I do understand that. But I do get frustrated with how they think you should be further along than you are in your recovery. 

Experience is the best teacher and I would welcome to just experience what I have been through and dont judge until you do. I am getting a little upset and this is therapeutic for me -I do wonder also if many people read my blog -it is me today in raw form since my feelings are posted in this blog. 

So I will end this and wish all my potential and interested readers a happy Memorial Day and God bless our veterans -I am a proud Marine honorably discharged.

Until next time

Monday, May 19, 2008

Working out?

I have been frustrated with the things that are happening in my life thus far. I just had my 47th birhday on the 14th and dont feel any older but I am aware of it due to the many health issues that have come abound. On March 17th I was diagnosed iwth prostate cancer -Prognosis looks good ,the tumor is small and on the 27th of this month I am going to get a cat scan to determine where the laser treatments with be directed at. And then 10-15 days later I will start the treatments. I have thyroid disease and I am on a lifetime medication which I dont like taking. Old hernia surgery is giving me occasional pain and discomfort which I am treating with more medication

Emotionally I am ok .lot better than 5 years ago when some tragic events happened that has changed my life forever. 

My love of the instuition of heatlh and fitness and how it affects the body was always a obsession since i was a child which lead to becoming a bodybuilder. I was never a athlete in high school but became hooked into the Pencil neck vs muscleman era back in the early 70's and then it became part of my daily rountine. Starting in my friends attic with the antiquated plastic weights that you could buy at many of the departments stores during that time. 

Anyhow I know that this is not quite the forum to be writing my life history but health and fitness does make up a large percentage of my history so it should fit. I will not write a book here but just know I could write a book on the many challenges that I have faced thus far to make two books . So there it is 

I am going to be taking steps to get back on that road full time instead of occasionally to embrace and display that love I still have for bodybuiiding ,health and fitness. 

Friday, May 16, 2008

Reflection on my Health and Fitness

I just had my 47th birthday on May 14 and I am not getting the results that I hoped but I did gain some muscle size since I started weight training in my home. It involved working out on my exercise wheel and dumbbells along with doing calisthenics- I have gotten stronger and my endurance has improved. Work still needs to be done so I am going to try to accomplish some of those goals this summer. I plan on rejoining my gym to work on those goals. I need to do more cardiovascular work such as treadmill and riding the bike. I have been walking but not to the extent that it would make a significant difference in my weight . Sedentary seems to be my middle name lately.

That is going to be another challenge for me . I was presented a challenge to workout more on the equipment that has been abandoned in my basement which consists of a bench , barbell curl bar and a bowflex type machine that I did work out on a little last week by a friend of mine and I think he is going to take some current pictures of my physique which I plan on posting on the site soon. . Motivation is the biggest challenge that needs to be prioritized in my routine.

Forgive me for not updating sooner but I have been busy with my education (pursuing my Master's Online in information Technology ) and health( dealing with my new diagnosis of prostate cancer) issues.So my plate is full right now with those issues and related issues that i wont mention at this time because it will fill many pages and bore the reader.

My day of birth has come and gone-I feel no older except on those cold damp days when I feel older that I am chronologically.

On that note I will close to continue to work on those goals

Good luck Kirk

Monday, May 12, 2008

The journey to my health and fitness goals

I have been out of sorts lately waiting for the ball to drop ,whatever that means to the occasional reader. I did on last week ,don't quite remember what day but I did go down and workout on a bow-flex type of exercise machine that was left by someone that did not want it anymore and was again exhilarated by those endorphins that surge throughout  your body after an intense workout . I do miss it but my motivation sucks at this point- it frustrates me to the nth degree.

 Bodybuilding,  health and fitness is my love and I will get back on track but I know it will take time to get where I think I should be. Looking  at my profile picture keeps my motivation at least active but not to the degree to keep me moving towards my goal -I use a diet software program call Diet Power that I think I mentioned in previous posts to chart my exercise and diet daily. It is more the diet than the exercise that I record on a daily basis -I know there is an error factor in what I record in reference to the calories I ingest and record in the program but I know from how I feel that it is close to what I am recording. I drink green tea every day mostly in the morning and eat oatmeal at least 5days every week. My overall diet could be improved but it is very easy to veer off course since I am not competing at this point . I know timing is a factor in what is going to take place as far as those goals I speak of. 

On that note a very good friend of mine that lives in the same apt complex that I stay in  has presented a challenge within to workout and improve my physique with the equipment that remains in the basement of our apt. complex and he is going to help me with taking some digital pictures of my physique to give me additional motivation to achieve those goals. I know I need to slim down my abdominal area to an acceptable level that I set for myself using the pics of my pre-contest and competition photos that I posted on some of my blogs and websites. I thank him in advance for that challenge. I told him and the rest of my unknown readers that I have many challenges that I would not rather deal with but I am always ready to take them on. 

Wish me luck on my latest challenge 

Until next time

Kirk 

Friday, May 9, 2008

Dying for lack of insurance

Take a look at this article and wonder how this can happen in the richest nation in the world -Men and women dying from cancer and just because they has no insurance to help them get the more advanced services that will increase their quality of life.
Which brings me to my update on my health status.
I went to see the oncologist on Thursday and gave him my choice of treatment  which is radiation treatments which will consist of lasers that will pinpoint and kill the tumor in my prostate gland
I am going to start on May 27 to get measured for  the procedure and they will perform a cat scan to determine where the lasers will concentrate on.
Then in 8-10 days after I will start the treatments which will span over a 9 week period, 5 days a week at the VA Hospital in my town . I am grateful based on this article that I am a veteran that is receiving  free medical services. -without it I will be up the creek with no paddle.

Mark Windsor looks exhausted. For a week he's been undergoing radiation treatment on a cancerous tumor in his neck. A metal rod fused to his spine keeps his head stable. His muscles there are gone, the result of multiple failed surgeries to rid him of his disease. He can't turn his head sideways or look up or down. So his look stays fixed, despite his fatigue.



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Dying for lack of insurance

Take a look at this article and wonder how this can happen in the richest nation in the world -Men and women dying from cancer and just because they has no insurance to help them get the more advanced services that will increase their quality of life.
Which brings me to my update on my health status.
I went to see the oncologist on Thursday and gave him my choice of treatment  which is radiation treatments which will consist of lasers that will pinpoint and kill the tumor in my prostate gland
I am going to start on May 27 to get measured for  the procedure and they will perform a cat scan to determine where the lasers will concentrate on.
Then in 8-10 days after I will start the treatments which will span over a 9 week period, 5 days a week at the VA Hospital in my town . I am grateful based on this article that I am a veteran that is receiving  free medical services. -without it I will be up the creek with no paddle.

Mark Windsor looks exhausted. For a week he's been undergoing radiation treatment on a cancerous tumor in his neck. A metal rod fused to his spine keeps his head stable. His muscles there are gone, the result of multiple failed surgeries to rid him of his disease. He can't turn his head sideways or look up or down. So his look stays fixed, despite his fatigue.



View Original Article

Blogged with the Flock Browser

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