Saturday, May 30, 2009

Another wake up call Part 2

I know my last blog concentrated on the accident itself and it now amazes me on how many personal injury lawyers contacted me by mail none by cell phone yet. Thank god I am alive to experience this. I am grateful and again humbled-still trying to find out what it (life ) all means . I do know that I will learn what those answers to my lingering questions are soon enough.
I am looking to get more correspondence as time goes on.

In the meantime I am enjoying and somewhat embracing the current experiences no matter how miniscule they are. It is funny how that seems to make sense at some point-that teaching and learning moment . And you go "oh that is what that means" Patience and humility are qualities of mine that are constantly being challenged along with my levels of anxiety .

I am going to see my therapist on the 4th to discuss my new experience and how it impacts my psyche. I am eager to speak on this since it has again lit that bulb in my head. Maybe telling me to be alert but not neurotic about future challenges yet to come.

I have come a long way since 2003 when my world fell apart Lots of insight and working on my physical , emotional and spiritual state. My experiences are similar with someone who has experienced exactly the same thing and maybe at the same time,but the reaction to these life experiences are much different which is where therapy has given me hope that things will get better.
I am still working on how I am going to approach my identity situation since my mom died and I have yet to grieve her death although I knew when I placed in the nursing home it was her final resting place. And my father has the answers to a lot of my questions regarding what I have questions about .
I have come to the conclusion that it may never take place since he is close to 90 and approaching the end of his life.

My physical health is avg. but better. I am working out at home with dumbbells and my ab wheel along with doing calisthenics . It helps although I need to be more consistent,which is my biggest challenge. I think it has to do with the unfinished business I have concerning my identity.
I have seem some changes from my inconsistent workouts but not as fast as I want to materialize More definition but still have weight issues - patience is my friend ,ally and best supporter.

Until next time
Kirk



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